Nanny FAQ

Frequently Asked Questions About Nannies

What is a nanny?

The International Nanny Association defines a nanny as one “employed by the family on either a live-in or live-out basis to undertake all tasks related to the care of children. Duties are generally restricted to childcare and the domestic tasks related to childcare. May or may not have had any formal training, though often has a good deal of actual experience. Nanny’s work week ranges from 40 to 60 hours per week. Usually works unsupervised.”

4nannies.com notes that a nanny is more than a baby-sitter. The nanny job is the best paying childcare career – and for good reason! Nannies are expected to participate in the social, emotional, and intellectual development of their charges, and will work with the child(ren) on such areas a language development, potty training, social manners, homework, and more. A typical work day is 8-10 hours. Most families request that a nanny make a minimum commitment of one year to the job. This is to make sure that the children have continuity in their childcare. Candidates who do not feel that they can commit to a year might consider other types of childcare work until they are comfortable with the commitment.

Before you apply to become a nanny you should ask yourself the following questions to judge your suitability for the work:

• Are you patient? Can you handle 8-10 hours on a stretch with a small child, perhaps with no other adult companionship? Are you reliable and trustworthy?
• Are you flexible enough to perform your childcare responsibilities according to the family’s rules?
• Are you a self-starter with initiative who can organize his/her day to accomplish all required tasks, while not neglecting your charge(s)?
• With children, things do not always go according to plan. Are you adaptable and flexible enough to change your routine to accommodate the sick child, for example, or the lost sneakers when you are on a deadline, without becoming upset?
• Are you a good communicator? You will work with the children for many hours during the day. At some point, you will have problems, questions or issues you will need to discuss with the parents. Can you initiate these conversations? Can you let the family know when there are problems in a calm, professional, problem-solving manner?

Being a nanny is hard work, but very rewarding. Make sure you are ready for the realities.

What are a family’s general expectations?

Parents choose nanny care to provide their children with individualized, personalized care that is consistent with the child rearing philosophies of the parents. Being a nanny is a job, a demanding one. Parents generally expect that the nanny have a genuine interest in the well-being of their children, and that the nanny have or obtain the necessary information and skills to provide quality care.

Parents generally expect that an engaged nanny will:

• Have the safety and well-being of the children as their primary concern while on duty.
• Read to the child daily. Provide stimulating and educational play, crafts and other activities.
• Model positive behavior for their children, including language and eating habits.
• Communicate with the parents. They appreciate the nanny keeping a nanny log [see information in the nanny helpful forms and information area].
• Arrive for work on time and ready to work. If a live-in, the parents do not expect to have to wake the nanny up for work each day.
• Take the necessary steps to acquire needed training in areas such as CPR Certification, First Aid Training, and professional development.
• Parents generally expect that an engaged nanny will not:
  • Spend the day watching TV instead of the children. OR Use the TV to baby-sit the children.
  • Spend time on personal telephone calls during work hours.
  • Smoke, drink alcoholic beverages, consume drugs, or swear while on duty.

What are the most important steps a nanny must take to find the right nanny job?

This is just a quick synopsis – there are many, many additional details provided at 4nannies.com to help a nanny successfully match with the right family.

• Envision Your Ideal Nanny Job: You need to define for yourself what your wants and needs are first. Do you have age preferences in caring for kids? What duties are you willing to take on? Cooking? Laundry? Housekeeping? Know what you are willing to do, as well as what you are either unwilling or unable to do. Be realistic – you cannot be a cook, housekeeper and care for infant twins all at the same time! Put your preferences — including the ‘must haves’ and the ‘would-be-nice-to-haves’ — in a list that you can refer back to when you get to the interview phase of the process. Decide what your income requirements are now, so salary discussions won’t be a stumbling block later.
• Search Jobs: 4nannies.com let’s you search currently available jobs anytime, for free! You can search the pool on such important characteristics as where the family lives, ages and number of children, seeking live in or live out staff, full time or part time, salary offered and more.
• The Initial Contact: Once you’ve identified possible jobs, you will want to contact the family to further determine your (and their) level of interest and suitability. You may either email or phone families that match your criteria. Use this step to further narrow the field to families with whom you would like to interview in depth. Remember, as a condition of membership you MUST respond to all family inquiries, even if it is only to say you are not interested.
• Interview: Remember your list from step one? Now’s the time to use that list to craft questions for a personal interview of the family. An in person interview is ideal; however many nannies are successful with telephone interviewing. However you conduct your interview, be sure to ask open-ended questions designed to elicit more than a simple “yes” or “no” response. Ask the question and then let the parents talk; listen carefully. More Interview Tips
• Conditional Job Offer Extended: Families will generally make their intitial job offer to you verbally, and it will be contingent on successful reference and background checks. Ask and get answers to any of your questions. This is the logical place in the process for you to bow out if the job, terms, or conditions do not meet your needs. Presuming you are delighted with the offer and opportunity, you would then proceed to provide your references and signed consent to perform a background check.
• Reference Checks: Be prepared with a list of your professional and personal references. The family will be looking for a minimum of two non-related references. This step usually takes place after you and the family have reached a tentative work agreement and they have made a contingent offer of employment. The family may choose to utilize the professional reference checking services are offered at 4nannies.com.
• Background Check: Every 4nannies.com family membership includes a pre-employment criminal background check. The family will need your signed consent to perform the background check. This is the time when you full name, date of birth and Social Security number need to be disclosed to the family.
• You Got the Job! Once you’re satisfied that you’ve found the right family, make sure the terms of your arrangement are spelled out in an  employment agreement that will be signed by all parties. This must include compensation, pay frequency, tax treatment, overtime compensation, benefits, holiday, sick and vacation day policies, expense reimbursement policy (especially if you are using your vehicle to transport the children), a specific treatment of duties and responsibilities, and a confidentiality clause. Try to schedule time for orientation to the family’s home, family members and schedule. Make sure you have the parent’s office and cell phone numbers, as well as written authorization to pick up the children from school or obtain medical care for them.

Please don’t try to take short cuts. Every step is important to a successful outcome.

What is a Job Contract?

A job contract is simply a written summary of the terms of employment. It is more commonly referred to as a ‘work agreement.’ Experts agree that every nanny and family should take the time to document the terms of employment. The work agreement, at a minimum, should address the following:

• Work Schedule: Days and Hours
• Compensation: Salary in gross terms, understanding on payroll taxes, pay frequency, and overtime compensation.
• Holiday and Vacation Schedules: Nannies typically expect 2 weeks paid vacation, understanding that it often will be timed to coincide with family vacation schedules, and paid holidays. Sick day arrangements vary.
• Childcare Duties : Be specific!
• Housekeeping Duties : Be specific and realistic!

Live in nannies should also have a written agreement regarding the living arrangements. Items such as curfew [a touchy subject], phone bills, overnight guests, out of town guests, and privacy expectations [of both parties] should be articulated. If the family advanced the nanny airfare, a repayment or debt forgiveness schedule should be included.

4nannies.com makes a sample work agreement available to all nanny candidates and families.

What is a typical nanny schedule?

A full time nanny will typically work 45 – 50 hours per week. A full time nanny will generally receive 2 consecutive days off per week – although not always Saturday and Sunday. Nanny schedules are fluid based on the needs of the family. Some parent occupations – airline pilot or cabin attendant, realtor, doctor for example – have unusual schedules. This should be a consideration and explained at time of interview. If the parent works 7 days on and 4 days off for example, the nanny schedule would likely follow that of the parent.

Beware the position that does not allow you sufficient time off. You need time away from any job to relax and recharge before another busy week and avoid burnout. With the long hours nannies work, this is even more important. In some cultures staff work 6 day or 7 day weeks – this is not the norm or expectation in the United States.

How can I improve my chances of getting a good job?:

Employers recruiting a nanny are often working in a short time frame, and the faster they can verify your information the better. Here are some tips:

• Download a nanny application form and complete immediately. We encourage families to require this application, and your having it ready can really save time.
• Obtain written letters of recommendation from your references, both previous employers, as well as teachers, clergy, and long time adult acquaintances.
• Go to your local DMV and obtain a copy of your driving record. If you are not licensed, this is the time to take care of that.
• Have copies of your recent CPR and First Aid certifications. If your certification has expired, get into a class to update these skills.
• Respond to families quickly. Be organized. Have your questions all lined up in advance. Use the interview forms on this website.

I am thinking of taking a job with a family 400 miles away. My parents are worried about my safety.

This is a frequently overlooked concern in nanny employment and a nanny is wise to think this through before accepting a job offer. We hear so much about families being concerned about leaving their children in the care of a relative stranger; nannies considering relocating and living with their employer need to be just a cautious. Here are some tips:

• Interview carefully! You should have at least two substantial telephone interviews before considering the job offer. It is your job to be prepared for these interviews … and there are exhaustive interview tips on 4nannies.com.
• Verify the name and location of the family you are speaking to. A listed phone number and a legal name can verify some of this information online at no cost. Public Records Now and Anywho.com are two such free resources. We recommend that these basic checks be done before you provide the family with your Release to Conduct a Background Check. We aren’t trying to scare you – just keep you safe.
• Check family references. For the family who has had previous childcare, ask for the names and numbers of their previous caregivers. These can be former nannies, family daycare providers, or center-based care. Explain why you are calling and ask them questions. Would they consider taking this job, or having their daughter take it? Were they paid on time? Is there anything about the family that they think you should know?
• Are you going to live with the family? Ask about the living arrangements. Do you have a private room? (You should…) Is it really a bedroom? What level of the house is it on? Does it have a window and door? This sounds silly, but occasionally a family will offer living accommodations in the loft (no privacy OR storage) or the basement (perhaps no window to allow escape during a fire) and not really think it through. How is the room furnished? Do you have your own bath or do you share with other family members? Make sure you think through what it means to live with another family and are comfortable with this.
• If at all possible, visit the family in person. Ask a friend or family member to accompany you … even if you have to drive all day to do so.
• Trust your instincts. If there is anything about the job or the family that makes you uneasy, keep looking.
• Have an escape plan. It is just foolish to consider moving hundreds of miles away without at least having either a friend nearby or enough money for a few nights in a motel, just in case. Call this insurance, and don’t leave home without it!

The vast majority of families are honest and caring, looking for the best care for their children. The parents should not object to your thoroughness and thoughtful consideration to the job offer, but rather see it as indicative of the care and caution you will exercise as their child’s caregiver. If a family objects to you asking questions, remember, there are many more families out there who will welcome them. You are an adult considering accepting an awesome responsibility for someone else’s children; make sure you take responsibility for yourself too.

What do you mean by “US work authorization required”?

In the United States, a family may legally hire a U.S. citizen, an alien lawfully admitted for permanent residence, or an alien with a valid work permit. US employers are required to verify a candidate’s employment eligibility using Form I-9. 4nannies.com discourages applicants who do not have US work authorization; however, it is the responsibility of the family to confirm that the candidate they wish to hire is legally eligible for work in the U.S.

I cannot afford airfare to where I want to work. Can I apply anyway?

Yes, you may certainly apply! Many families will agree to hire a nanny who lives at a distance. For example, the nanny may live in Oklahoma, and the family may be in Boston. It is customary for the family to advance the nanny’s transportation expense, with the understanding that the nanny will reimburse the family out of the first several paychecks (usually about $50 – 100 per week). This may not be airfare, as more economical transportation may be available such as bus or train.

Many families will offer to reimburse these transportation expenses to the nanny after she has worked for the full year agreed to. This is a form of bonus to the nanny. If the nanny leaves before the year is out, it is generally at her expense. All issues regarding the transportation expenses should be clearly spelled out in the work agreement, so there is never a “he said…you said” kind of exchange.

If you are considering taking a job overseas, you should consider obtaining an ‘open return’ or ‘open-ended round-trip ticket’. Open-ended means that you are not required to specify the date of your return flight at the time of purchase. Because of this convenience, open-ended tickets are usually more expensive than regular round-trip tickets. Open-ended tickets generally require travel to be completed within one year. Each airline will have its own conditions and restrictions that apply. This type of ticket insures that you can get home if you want to.

I smoke. Is that a problem?

Yes, this may in fact be a problem. When surveyed, 89% of families state that they would not hire the nanny who smokes. Many non-smoking households will consider a nanny who smokes but agrees never to smoke while on duty or in the presence of the children. Be honest about this…non-smokers can usually detect when someone smokes. Second-hand smoke is unhealthy for children, and families are within their rights to insist that their home be smoke-free.

Do I need a driver’s license?

Most families require that the nanny be able to drive the children, whether to play dates, the doctors office, or to preschool. It is a good idea that you obtain your driver’s license before applying for a nanny job. If you do not drive, you will find the greatest success looking for a position with a family in a major metropolitan area with established public transit – New York City is an example.

How old do you have to be to become a nanny?

18 is generally the minimum age that a family will accept for a nanny candidate. Many will not accept the candidate under 20. If you are younger, you may consider a year or two of work in a day care center, preschool, or similar environment to gain experience.

I am going on a job interview. What do I need to know?

This is a topic that cannot just be covered here in an FAQ! We have PAGES of suggested interview questions here: Suggested Nanny Interview Questions. And remember, this is an interview and appearances are important. You should be dressed just as neatly as you would be for a day on the job. Panty hose and heels are not required, but a clean, neat conservative top and slacks are appropriate. Something a baby could burp on and that you can stay modestly covered if you get on the floor to play with legos.

Being on time is critical. If you can’t manage to be on time for an interview, it is assumed you will be unable to be on time for work. The family depends on the punctuality of the nanny so they can meet their professional and personal commitments. On those rare occasions when there is a real reason for being late, be appropriately apologetic, and call at the earliest possible moment to let them know you will be late.

Be prepared. You should have a good idea of the family’s needs and expectations before the initial interview. You should have an equally good idea of how your skills and expertise might fit into this particular job. No two nanny jobs are alike.

Make sure to have several questions prepared for the family. It is hard to appear interested if you can’t come up with a single question. Questions that refer to specific family or child needs and expectations will be impressive and will demonstrate you have considered this position carefully.

Be warm, friendly and direct, but maintain appropriate boundaries. The family doesn’t want to hear the sagas of your personal life. If you cross those boundaries, even the most laid-back of interviewers will be left with the impression that your personal life will interfere with your work.

Many parents are not good interviewers. The parent may ask simple questions, such as, “Do you have experience in diaper changing?” You may need to take some initiative to make this a good interview. Don’t just answer “yes.” Give examples of times you’ve had to perform that particular task and why you were successful or had an impact. If the answer is “no,” tell the parent about a transferable skill or experience, or how you will take the initiative and responsibility for learning the skill to prepare for the job because you want it so badly.

Many families will ask questions like “Tell me about your upbringing.” They look to how you describe your parents and siblings and life events for clues on how you see yourself — as a winner or loser, as empowered or oppressed. Be prepared for this type of question. Families also look for you to display a positive, can-do attitude – to demonstrate the flexibility to adjust your behavior to the family’s expectations regardless on how you may have worked in the past. Caregivers need to be consistent in messages to the children; the families are looking for team players.

What does the family mean when they say they are doing a ‘background check’

Most families insist that a nanny’s background be verified before extending a firm offer of employment. 4nannies.com strongly encourages families to call all personal references and employment references to verify the information you supplied on your application. They will often do some of this before even interviewing you in person, or it may follow the personal interview. When they decide that you are the candidate they are looking for, they will generally make a ‘contingent’ offer of employment. This means they are offering you a specific job, and you discuss responsibilities, start date, and compensation contingent on your background check coming back clean. If you accept the job, they will order and pay for a background check. 4nannies.com families have a background check included in their 4nannies.com service fee and almost always use it. Items checked may include your Social Security Number history, your criminal record, sex offender registries, and sometimes even drug/infectious disease screening will be done (at the family’s expense). Most families will insist that you obtain a copy of your driving record (DUIs and speeding violations are not good); you can do this at any DMV office in your state. If there are not skeletons in your closet, the employment offer will be binding.

Knowing that your background will be scrutinized, you should fully disclose any potential problems in your application or in your interview. It is better to explain that you got a speeding ticket two years ago and have learned your lesson before the family finds out about it themselves.

How much are nannies paid? What is a fair wage?

Nanny wages vary across the country. They will be based on your experience and education, the specific responsibilities of the job (including number of children and other assigned responsibilities), and whether the job is live in or live out.

How can I stay safe when I look for a job online?

First, what must be said is that your safety is your responsibility. No one can keep you safe when you are looking for a job – or in any other activity for that matter – better than you can yourself. Please read Tips for aSafe Job Search before you begin interviewing.

Red Flags….

• Family offers to hire you without interviewing
• Family offers you money in advance
• ANY references to a cruise ship
• ANY references to Africa
• ANY references to textile importing or fashion boutique
• AMAZING salaries or work conditions. No, you will not get hired for a $2000 a week, 5 hour a day job without an interview!
• Mother died in a horrible car accident
• Asking you to open a bank account, especially with Wells Fargo
• Needs a ‘favor’ with you to forward money someplace for medical care … furniture moving … child’s tuition … payment to colleague … via Western Union

The following are some tips to consider:

• Follow President Reagan’s philosophy – Trust, but verify. The vast majority of families are completely honest and above board. The majority, not everyone. Ask the family for references, particularly their former childcare provider (nanny or daycare). Use our free form  Checking a Family’s References to help you out.
• Practice safe interviewing. Best practices are to meet the family initially in a well trafficed public place – a fast food restaurant with a children’s play area or coffee shop for example. If you are meeting in a private home, we encourage you to bring a friend to the interview. They can either wait in the car outside, or if you use public transit they can wait in a nearby coffee shop. Let the family know you are bringing a friend in advance. These cautions are not intended to scare you – after all the in person interview is hands-down the best way to determine a good nanny:family job match. Instead, we want to empower you to be SAFE in your job search, and not become a victim of a mugging, sexual assault, or worse.
• Don’t send money! Don’t give out your bank account information! You will be ripped off – we guarantee it!
• If you are looking for a live in nanny job – online or through an agency it doesn’t matter – always have an escape plan – a way to get home or to friends if you don’t feel safe or it just doesn’t work out.
• Trust your instincts. If there is anything about the job or the family that makes you uneasy, keep looking.

We have been helping nannies find jobs since 1998. A few nannies have gotten into uncomfortable positions. Always we find they failed to heed one or more of the suggestions above. Remember, it’s your safety, your job.